The End

Today is Sunday, usually Sunday is my favorite day of the week but for the over a month now I have been left behind as I watch my family,husband parents and siblings all leave for church without me, I have to say There have been plenty of compromises made in accommodation with this pregnancy and not attending church is the my least favorite however this is probably my last Sunday pregnant, and I can hardly even believe where all the time has gone?!! I am ready to have my body back and be able to have a little normalcy in my life again but at the same time I feel apprehensive and sad that I will no longer get to feel my sweet babies move inside my body all the time. Regardless of how many pounds I've gained (and no I'm not ashamed its a grand total of 70 just in case you were wondering) how many stretch marks have showed up (lost count a LONG time ago), or how uncomfortable or inconvenient things have become during my pregnancy I really have enjoyed being pregnant and truly wouldn't take back a single stretch mark or ache for any part of this incredible experience. Unfortunately since Tristan has stopped growing, my dr. has planned a C-seciton for this Saturday the 22nd feeling as though there really is not much else that can be gained if he were to stay in eutro. Fortunately Atticus continues to grow and develop and with any luck will not have too many problems being born prematurely at 34 weeks and 6 days. Its so surreal that this is my last week.. I do have a sonogram this Friday and if there have been any drastic changes for the better as far as Tristan goes than there is a chance that my c-section would be called off, but even knowing that I'm in my last few weeks is just so insane.. I don't know if its the apprehension of having not one but two babies or the unknowns of premature babies but either way I am not ready yet!!! Of course who ever is right?! My body has also started to show some signs that is almost done as well, I am swollen like a tick! its really quite comical but my blood pressure has gotten higher causing the swelling as well as some nasty migraines the past week, not to mention my belly has quite literally taken a nose dive... no longer can my muscles hold up my ever growing belly and it has dropped considerable and seems to be growing downward.. its really funny and I am sure I will look back on these pictures one day and die in laughter but even if I'm not ready, my body is getting ready so if not Saturday not too long after (really crossing my fingers not before!!) other than that things are going pretty well with the babies they have several test each week and continue to do very well.

On a very sad note a good friend I went to high school and church with passed away this Saturday. Shane Smith. He recently returned home from a full and faithful mission he served in Guatemala. Saturday he was involved in a hang gliding accident and was called back home to his Heavenly Father. Anyone who knew Shane can attest to how fun and positive he was. He was always doing something crazy weather it was hang gliding, cliff jumping, wake boarding, you name it there was nothing he wouldn't nor could not do exceptionally well. I feel very honored to to have been one of his friends and be apart of that zest for life he carried. One summer in particular he taught me how to wake board, took me on a couple of dates one of which involved him taking his fathers truck way up this mountain on a trail that was pretty much non existent and nearly crashing his dads truck (sorry brother Smith he probably never mentioned this to you) to get to the top of the trial. Once at at our destination he treated me to pizza on the very summit of this Cliff where you could see all the city lights. Shane was a great friend, a great brother, son, and a prime example of how to live life to the fullest. There is no doubt in my mind Heavenly Father had a greater plan for Shane and that his life on earth was short but complete. Until we meet agian Shane.